So then, you want to know about the OJPL? Okay then. The OJPL is a library system with many libraries. Is it real or a figment of your imagination? This is one good question. Another good question is what is the purpose of us? Other things to know: the OJPL will lend you books; the OJPL serves its community; the OJPL is barely functional.
Contact us through various means:
  • e-mail (
  • telephone
  • postal service
  • in-person

Visit our Branches to learn about library hours and branch-specific policies.

Check out our Catalog to see the sorts of things that, um, exist and stuff.*

Read our rarely updated Blog to keep up with our not-so-new news items. [UPDATE: Announcing newly new OJPL News Division!]

*The OJPL Catalog is subject to the whims of OJPL Catalogers and the inherent biases of the OJPL Integrated Library System. Actual existence of cataloged items is thereby not guaranteed.

A Brief History of Time

Once upon a time, there was the OJPL.

Internet Use Policy

Be nice to the computer.

Educational Video

Bottled Sunshine...A Juicy Story, Produced by Hack Swain Productions, from State Archives of Florida


Q. What does OJPL stand for?
A. Orange Juice Public Library. [hide]
Q. I recently found your library and am interested in hearing how it received the name. What is the significance of orange juice to the founder?
A. Many patrons seem to be under the misconception that the OJPL has some sort of "founder" that "created" it, when it is quite obvious that the OJPL has always existed. Before there was time, there was the OJPL. Philosophers and theologists from time immemorial have debated the nature of the OJPL, its ontology and its cosmology, not to mention its epistemology. While certain schools of thought tend to use the OJPL as a proof of God (known as the OJpological Proof) or use the OJPL as a tool to pursue wacky political agendas (usually involving unripened fruit), more serious scholars have come to recognize fundamental realities that are best communicated to human minds through the metaphor of juice that comes from an orange. While debates on topics such as "where does the OJPL get its name?" might be engaging, let's say, as a form of intellectual masturbation, you might as well be asking "why is the sky blue?" or "what is the meaning of life?" I mean, who cares, right, as long as there is plenty of terror porn to go around. We here at the OJPL do not question the OJPL. It exists because it exists. And it could only be called the OJPL, because that is its name. It's like the chicken and the egg. Right? You know, only with oranges. [hide]
Q. I heard one of your librarians is a specialist in copyleft and right. I am wondering how one goes about obtaining a patent and copyright on a type of font - maybe something called -REDACTED-? please keep this matter i don't want others to "copy" the font.
A. The OJPL does, in fact, have a specialist in this field of inquiry with impeccable credentials, having studied under world renowned librarian/lawyer superstar Hungarian Peter "Jasco" Jacso.

This being said, the OJPL is not able to give advice on legal matters, as we here at the OJPL believe that "laws are for suckers."

But seriously though, the process of obtaining a patent and copyright on a type of font is a complicated one, and rigorous to boot. The first step is realizing that what you want is not a patent at all (unless your font is some sort of chemical composition that may include mixtures of ingredients as well as new chemical compounds). The next step is coming up with a cool symbol to trademark. All of this, as you can see, is very rigorous. And complicated. In fact, depending on what legal system you are dealing with, you might be required to emigrate to another country, due to the fact, to choose one example, that the United States does not recognize the intellectual property in typeface designs because fonts are not subject to protection as artistic works under the 1976 Copyright Revision Act.

At this point, we would need more information from the patron, in order to better serve their information needs. If your goal is to make a lot of money, we recommend instead inheriting money from your billionaire relatives. If your goal is to simply prevent others from copying your font, stemming from a communitarian impulse to "protect the children", we recommend a slick media campaign targeted at the 17-35 demographic involving comparisons of font theft to DVD pirateering and marijuana smoking.

We have attached an image of the copyleft symbol that you can attach to your creations at your leisure. This symbol is used by all of the cool kids and has no legal meaning. [hide]
Q. Are you looking for a new librarian? I am interested in applying for the position.
A. Thank you for your interest in becoming an OJPL librarian. We accept applications for positions once a year during an unspecified time period. If you qualify for becoming an OJPL librarian, you will be put onto "The List," at which point you will be eligible to wait around for no less than 5 months for the chance to interview for a handful of jobs. If you are still not a librarian after 9 months of being on "The List," you will be required to reapply. [hide]
Q. I would like to reserve the space at the ojpl for high tea on tuesday may 2nd from 3:45-??? i am not sure the reservation policy but i will be there with a few close friends - so i hope you are ready.
A. There are a number of OJPL branches that offer high tea services. Please contact individual branches to enquire further. [hide]
Q. Does the OJPL have a phone number?
A. Yes. [hide]
Q. Do any of the OJPL branches have a fax or services for the handicap - especially those with hearing and visual limitations?
A. Faxing / accessibility / assistive technologies is one area in which the OJPL is sorely lacking. While certain OJPL OPAC stations have Universal Access software built into them due to their open-source Ubuntu operating systems that include such packages by default, there is still much room for improvement. Some branches are known to have magnifying glasses and extra pairs of eyeglasses of varying strength lying around and the Maunawili Branch does have reading companion dogs.*
*Reading companion dogs might or might not be dead and/or retired, so please be considerate if requesting such services. [hide]
Q. Do you have any staff members that know morse code?
A. The OJPL staff has many hidden talents that we on the OJPL FAQ Writing Committee know nothing about. Perhaps this is one. [hide]
Q. I have a color printer, copier and scanner available for sale. would you be interested?
A. Large purchases must be discussed by various branch committees and go through a rigorous bidding process. Currently, printer acquisition is not a high priority for the OJPL, but that does not mean we are not interested. Of course, we would only want a functioning doohickey. We already have two non-functioning printers, so please do not mistake us for some sort of non-functioning printer orphanage. Although, perhaps we will start such a service in the future. In fact, we've just trademarked the term. A set of computer speakers jacuzzi would be nice to have, though. [hide]